Black Mirror Review

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That uneasy feeling you get when you know something cringy is about to happen but you keep watching anyway...pretty much sums up Black Mirror on Netflix. This show is definitely not for kids.

Post-Election Thoughts

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The past few days have been very strange, sad and almost surreal for me. I've been unable to resist the urge to check Facebook and other social media often, even knowing that what I will find will make me more depressed. So instead of keeping my thoughts and feelings inside, I think it's time for me to address the orange elephant in the room.

Initially I was very shocked and confused. How could this happen? Then I became afraid for the safety of my friends and family. Then it hit me even harder because I now have a child and I became terrified something might happen to her. I felt reassured by others that this is not likely especially since she is in a childcare setting now. However my heart goes out to all those kids that are in school (even kindergarten!) and facing racism and discrimination even in the first 24 hours of Trump being elected.

Now that my emotions have settled a little, I thought I would share some reflections and hopefully instill some positivity and optimism amidst all the negativity surrounding this whole issue.

1. I do not (cannot) believe that all those who voted for Trump are necessarily bad/racist/sexist/homophobic/anything non-white-phobic people. I don't think they all wished for anyone to be harmed by their decision. Although, I hope that they reflect about the repercussions that are unfolding now and those that will happen in the future as a result of their decision. My hope is that they will be a part of a movement toward tolerance, fighting hate, supporting the marginalized and expanding their personal world view. 

However, for those that have shown their true colors (or lack of color) recently in despicable actions and speech, I think that is a good thing. It makes it easier to diagnose the cancer of hatred that is within some in this country and work toward a cure. Because as much as I want to hate those who hate, how does that make me any better? In the Qur'an, God says:

"...Repel evil by that which is better, and then the one who is hostile to you will become as a devoted friend..." (41:34)

And the Prophet Muhammad said: 

"Support your brother whether he is an oppressor or the oppressed" when he was asked how can one help an oppressor, he replied "by preventing him from committing injustice." (Sahih Muslim 2584)

2.  This is a reminder that everything happens for a reason and that God has a plan. I do not and may not ever understand why things happen the way they do. However, I won't let the external world determine my internal world. I will choose to focus on what I can do to better myself and the world around me. That cannot happen if I continuously stroll down the rabbit hole that is social media and useless arguments. Instead I need to be proactive, learn, innovate, empower and grow as much as possible.

3. While I like to believe there is good in everyone, there are some scary people out there that have certainly been emboldened by the recent election. They have been harming people who do not think, look or sound like them in ways that might seem more 'socially acceptable' to them since Trump is won the election. This behavior is unacceptable and we must stand together to quell these bullies. Be vigilant, be cautious and if something happens, try to take a video if possible and report it to the authorities!

4. If you do witness any kind of racism/sexism/discrimination/fear-mongering, speak-up! Be an ally! Don't be a bystander. If there is danger, notify the authorities. Also, we must all strive to lead by example and teach our little ones that hate/bigotry/racism/sexism/violence is not acceptable.

5. For those who have been politically inactive/apathetic in the past elections or most recent election because 'it doesn't matter', hopefully this will be a lesson for you that it does matter, and that we collectively have to be more involved in what goes on around us for our sakes and future generations.

6. The fact that so many people are sad/angry/depressed/confused indicates that they care about this country. That is a good thing. Let's turn all those negativities into something awesome! Let's support one another, let's empathize, love, build, welcome, and grow together more!

Hang in there everyone! My hope is that sociologists years from now will study this period in American history as a proverbial 'dark ages' that precedes a 'renaissance' in which tolerance, equality, love, strength, well-being, and happiness prevail.

New Year Reflections: Body Image

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Around 5th grade was the time I began to compare myself to other girls. I noticed that only thin girls were popular and considered cute by their boy counterparts. I wasn't exactly overweight but I wasn't in the skinny category either. Nevertheless, I started to pay more attention to my diet and exercise by that tender age of 11. From then on I had issues with body image and perception of beauty. I thought that to be beautiful I had to be thin.

Advice for the Expecting/New Mom

My honeybun

It's been almost 4 months as a new mom and I wanted to offer advice to any other expecting/new moms that might be helpful. If you have any further questions don't hesitate to ask!

1. Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is HARD. Really hard, at first. You might have sore/bleeding nipples, back pain from weird postures and overall frustration. Also, newborns feed about every 2 hours so expect sleep deprivation. But I promise if you stick with it, it will definitely get easier. Before you leave the hospital try to get as much help as you can with the latch from lactation consultants and use the support resources they offer if you continue to have issues.

Marriage Advice

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This post is in honor of the many couples whose weddings I got to attend this year, those who will be married soon and those who have been married for longer. This marriage advice is based off of my experience so take whatever good you can from it!

1. Don't compare

Your relationship is unique. Each partner is a unique individual and you are building a life together. What works for one couple may not work for you. Try not to think of how marriage is/is not "supposed" to be like and instead focus on being present to your own marriage and your partner. If you have loaded expectations of what the perfect marriage is and those are not being met then this might set it up for failure.

Tea Party

The Chicken and the Egg

When my mom found me, I was curled up into a fetal position. I was counting down the minutes for the Advil to work.

“Imagine your pain multiplied by 100, that’s what labor pains are like,” she said as she covered me with a fuzzy fleece blanket. Having this pain once a month is enough for me.

“That’s a huge sacrifice that mothers make,” I said.
“It’s true, but people underestimate the chicken,” she replied.
“What do you mean?”
“Women go through these pains once a month and go through a lot to deliver a baby,” she explained, “but the chicken does that every single day.”

She recounted that as a young child, every morning she would hear the loud clucks of a distressed chicken, signaling the laying of an egg. Soon after, the eggs would be collected for consumption. Sometimes chickens would lay eggs multiple times a day. After some time, the chicken that had provided their daily sustenance would be sacrificed for food as well.

When the medicine started working I began to feel hungry. I wanted something warm to soothe my cramps and found some boiled chicken my mom had made. I soft boiled an egg and ladled some chicken and broth in to a bowl. With a newfound appreciation for the chicken and the egg I enjoyed every bite, realizing this chicken lived, experienced pain and died in order to provide food and comfort to me. Now I have found new meaning in the normal routine of cooking eggs for breakfast or using chicken to make a casserole.

Chicken, I have underestimated you. You are strong and generous, and I thank you for your sacrifice.